Friday, January 14, 2005
'tis a puzzlement...
The truth of the matter is, well, that's not true. Over the last few months there have been a number of gentlemen who have expressed their appreciation for me. Men whom I know on some level, men who have used words that have made me blush and smile shyly. Words such as awesome, admirable, clever,witty and even, dare I say, deep. Nor has it only been my brains that have been appreciated, as I have been called cute and a hottie.
Definitely words designed to turn a girl's head. Especially from the men in question. And while I am deeply appreciative of these men and their kind words - indeed, I revel in them to a certain extent - there is one little problem.
All are very happily married. Except for one. And he's got a girlfriend he seems pretty happy with.
Well, spank my ass and call me Beatrice.
I have no idea why this is. What sort of energy I'm emitting that causes happily attached men to be so incredibly sweet to me while remaining somewhat invisible to available men.
So I asked a couple of the married men in question. GruvLoungeGoth mulled it over, then said that, maybe, the married fellows just wanted me to realize that, though things might be a little bleak in the dating department right now, that I do have qualities that are attractive to the opposite sex and to hang in there.
Definitely very nice to hear. If only there were some way that the single guys could see through the eyes of these unavailable but oh-so-sweet men...
Then again, that may not entirely be all of it. When I asked TheFirst, his initial reaction was, "I'm not touching that one." He was concerned about incriminating himself. But on further discussion he posited the following theories:
"You have that aura of depth about you that I can tell would make those moments special[...]. While I know that a close, emotional relationship with you would be all manners of satisfying for any man mature enough to appreciate it, it's that very thing that also paralyzes many men.
"You’re highly introspective and very extroverted at the same time. You’re intelligent, clever and observant. Face it: A guy can be intimidated by a woman with all that. A man would have to be very secure with himself to enter into an emotional relationship with you. And before you start, yes, there are men like that out there and no, they’re not all married."
Yes, I blushed for probably a good ten minutes after my initial reading of that and thanked him for the super sweet words. Hell, I'm blushing now even with the re-read. And I'll admit, while I'd like to think he's right, I often feel that someone's locked up the single fellas someplace or shipped them to another city. Because I'm not finding them here in LaLaLand.
Maybe it's time to find a new city...
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United States, California, Los Angeles, San Fernando Valley, English, Carol, Female, 36-40.