Tuesday, September 21, 2004

musical interlude... 

Sometimes I wish that I was an angel
A fallen angel who visits your dreams
And in those dreams I'd blow you a message that says
You really want me

Sometimes I wish that I was a wrestler
A Mexican wrestler in a red vinyl mask
And I might grab you, body slam you, and maybe cause
physical harm
But when we would land
I might take pity on you
I can crack all your ribs
But I can't break your heart

You will never love me
And this I can't forgive
That you will never love me
As long as I will live

Sometimes I wish that I was a beauty
A beautiful girl who was still 21
And I'd turn your head as well as your buddies
And I could afford to play hard to get
We'd go to parties and you'd show me off
And I'd go home with someone else

You will never love me
And this I can't forgive
And it will always bug me
As long as I will live
You will never love me
Why should I even care
It's not that you're so special
You're just the cross I bear

You will never love me
Mexican Wrestler by Jill Sobule (from I Never Learned to Swim)

The first time I heard this song I was walking down Sunset Boulevard, enjoying the February sun warming on my skin, the music playing in my ears. Initially I found the lyrics somewhat whimsical. Until Ms. Sobule sang the chorus.

At that point I nearly felt the wind knocked from me, my knees threatening to buckle. Had I not been walking down a very public street, I have no doubt I would have allowed myself to sink to the ground.

Yeah, this song hits me on several levels, one of which is probably obvious. Maybe I identify with music far too much.


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Carol/Female/36-40. Lives in United States/California/Los Angeles/San Fernando Valley, speaks English. Spends 40% of daytime online. Uses a Normal (56k) connection.
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