Monday, August 25, 2003
Mind at ease...
Sometimes you just need a bit of time and space and several fun moments spent with a (relatively) objective friend and/or family to just calm the hell down and get a little perspective.
Friday night, after dealing with rush hour traffic on the 405 for over an hour and a half, CuteNerdBoy picked me up at work so that we could see Dr. Strangelove, which I'd never seen before. (What? Why do people keep looking at me as if I've grown extra heads? Geez Louise!) Better yet, we saw it in an honest-to-goodness old-time-style movie theater, not on video as I thought I'd eventually watch the movie.
We drove south and made it to San Pedro early enough to grab a quick, but yummy, bite and to rush to the theater. And I declared the film to be good. And it was so. (Not to mention, still pretty relevant. Scary, no?)
Anyway, over the course of the evening, after being his typical sweet self in the giving of not only Another Disc #5 but a copy of his favorite book (Master and Commander - for me to either keep or release into the wild, as I see fit - I'm very touched by such a gift), our usual topics of music and books and movies were discussed. But we also talked about, in a rather general fashion, dating and sex and suicide and depression. Yeah, really light topics there.
On Saturday, while I was at work, I ruminated over the previous evening and, in my usual manner, over-analyzed everything I said. I tend to be a pretty honest person, as most of the time I just don't see the point in prevarication, even when it might be to my own benefit. After thinking about Friday night's conversations, I started wondering if some of my statements could be taken to mean that I was an over-sexed emotionally unstable nutjob. On the way home, waiting for the bus, I mentally composed a 'blog entry about some of my uncertainties.
Luckily, before I could sit down at my computer at home, Linda showed up for our farewell dinner, the last time I'd get a chance to see her before she heads home on Tuesday. We talked about my concerns, as well as various other subjects, and very quickly she put my mind at ease. So much so that by the end of the evening we were both positively silly, giggling and guffawing, with me drawing attention from people in other cars by acting generally wacky in the car. (Okay, maybe the nutjob part isn't too far off.)
Then yesterday, after a full day of laundry and gift shopping and a really fun, cute Hulk-themed birthday for my nephew (who turns four today - happy, happy birthday to him!!!) with lots of children and a pinata and pool splashing and food and laughter and cake and ice cream and the like, my older brother and his girlfriend rushed me to meet CuteNerdBoy at a park in the west end of the San Fernando Valley, where the big band in which his step-father plays was having a free outdoor concert. I only missed a couple of songs, thank heaven (it was a little touch and go there for a while).
I ended up meeting his mother, step-father, aunt, step-sister, step-brother-in-law and a neighbor of his mother and step-father (introduced as his step-neighbor). Yeah, I know. I knew I'd probably meet his mother, aunt and step-father, and I admit I was a little scared at the prospect. I was not prepared for the others.
I'm also still thinking that maybe the top I was wearing was a little too low-cut for such a meeting, though I've been assured by others that it's not that low. Then again, that could just be compared to some of the other outfits they've seen me in. Sometimes it's hard to judge when you're a little on the busty side.
CuteNerdBoy had also invited a bunch of his other friends, several of whom I knew in high school, which excited me because I hoped that I'd get to see them again. Then again, he had also warned me that they might not show. He was right. None of them were there.
Anyway, it was very much a "Everyone, this is my friend Carol from high school," type of introduction, which is pretty much true, though we didn't know each other that well back then, despite working on a play together in 11th grade. But I also wonder what, if anything, he's told them about me, because I did detect a smidge of protectiveness on the parts of several of the others in regards to CuteNerdBoy, which I can certainly understand. I'd probably be the same way. I just hope I acquitted myself well. I tried to be my usual charming, funny self, without traipsing into nutjob territory. I also tried my best to not seem like a woman on the prowl, because that always goes over so well with relatives of the guy you're kind of dating and you happen to be rather in like with.
(I keep reminding myself, it's still pretty early yet, we're really just getting to know each other. Personally, I'm liking who I'm getting to know. Okay, okay, so I may be the teeniest bit smitten with the fella. So sue me. )
In the end no one seemed to treat me like I had bubonic plague, so I consider that to be a positive sign. His step-sister gave me a little hug as we parted and her husband took my hand in both of his and stared into my eyes as he said that it was good meeting me, plus as CuteNerdBoy's aunt drove me home, with him in the passenger seat (I ducked into the back seat before anything could be discussed because I hate to seem presumptuous - I thought it terrific of them to drive me all the way across the Valley when the concert was on the same side of town in which they lived - they seemed to not even consider it an issue), we spoke rather easily, I thought. That's a good thing, right?
His mother was very sweet and very nice and way too young looking to have a son the same age as me (his aunt is pretty young looking too). I knew that CuteNerdBoy had a good relationship with his mother, but it was so cute to see them together - he's obviously close to her, but he doesn't seem to be a mama's boy. Hanging out with all of them, I can certainly see the genesis of CuteNerdBoy's sense of humor, which I think is rather similar to mine, as well as his generally open nature. It was just a wonderful time with good music, people watching (the cutest nearly-three-year-old twin girls were dancing nearby, sometimes with their mother) and a group of fun, friendly folks.
For me, you know what was best of all about yesterday's big band evening? Soon after I arrived, when I had gotten myself situated on the blanket sitting in front of CuteNerdBoy, he leaned over from his low beach chair, tapped me on the shoulder, and said to me, his mouth not too far from my ear, "I'm really glad you could make it."
Me too, my friend. Me too.
Friday night, after dealing with rush hour traffic on the 405 for over an hour and a half, CuteNerdBoy picked me up at work so that we could see Dr. Strangelove, which I'd never seen before. (What? Why do people keep looking at me as if I've grown extra heads? Geez Louise!) Better yet, we saw it in an honest-to-goodness old-time-style movie theater, not on video as I thought I'd eventually watch the movie.
We drove south and made it to San Pedro early enough to grab a quick, but yummy, bite and to rush to the theater. And I declared the film to be good. And it was so. (Not to mention, still pretty relevant. Scary, no?)
Anyway, over the course of the evening, after being his typical sweet self in the giving of not only Another Disc #5 but a copy of his favorite book (Master and Commander - for me to either keep or release into the wild, as I see fit - I'm very touched by such a gift), our usual topics of music and books and movies were discussed. But we also talked about, in a rather general fashion, dating and sex and suicide and depression. Yeah, really light topics there.
On Saturday, while I was at work, I ruminated over the previous evening and, in my usual manner, over-analyzed everything I said. I tend to be a pretty honest person, as most of the time I just don't see the point in prevarication, even when it might be to my own benefit. After thinking about Friday night's conversations, I started wondering if some of my statements could be taken to mean that I was an over-sexed emotionally unstable nutjob. On the way home, waiting for the bus, I mentally composed a 'blog entry about some of my uncertainties.
Luckily, before I could sit down at my computer at home, Linda showed up for our farewell dinner, the last time I'd get a chance to see her before she heads home on Tuesday. We talked about my concerns, as well as various other subjects, and very quickly she put my mind at ease. So much so that by the end of the evening we were both positively silly, giggling and guffawing, with me drawing attention from people in other cars by acting generally wacky in the car. (Okay, maybe the nutjob part isn't too far off.)
Then yesterday, after a full day of laundry and gift shopping and a really fun, cute Hulk-themed birthday for my nephew (who turns four today - happy, happy birthday to him!!!) with lots of children and a pinata and pool splashing and food and laughter and cake and ice cream and the like, my older brother and his girlfriend rushed me to meet CuteNerdBoy at a park in the west end of the San Fernando Valley, where the big band in which his step-father plays was having a free outdoor concert. I only missed a couple of songs, thank heaven (it was a little touch and go there for a while).
I ended up meeting his mother, step-father, aunt, step-sister, step-brother-in-law and a neighbor of his mother and step-father (introduced as his step-neighbor). Yeah, I know. I knew I'd probably meet his mother, aunt and step-father, and I admit I was a little scared at the prospect. I was not prepared for the others.
I'm also still thinking that maybe the top I was wearing was a little too low-cut for such a meeting, though I've been assured by others that it's not that low. Then again, that could just be compared to some of the other outfits they've seen me in. Sometimes it's hard to judge when you're a little on the busty side.
CuteNerdBoy had also invited a bunch of his other friends, several of whom I knew in high school, which excited me because I hoped that I'd get to see them again. Then again, he had also warned me that they might not show. He was right. None of them were there.
Anyway, it was very much a "Everyone, this is my friend Carol from high school," type of introduction, which is pretty much true, though we didn't know each other that well back then, despite working on a play together in 11th grade. But I also wonder what, if anything, he's told them about me, because I did detect a smidge of protectiveness on the parts of several of the others in regards to CuteNerdBoy, which I can certainly understand. I'd probably be the same way. I just hope I acquitted myself well. I tried to be my usual charming, funny self, without traipsing into nutjob territory. I also tried my best to not seem like a woman on the prowl, because that always goes over so well with relatives of the guy you're kind of dating and you happen to be rather in like with.
(I keep reminding myself, it's still pretty early yet, we're really just getting to know each other. Personally, I'm liking who I'm getting to know. Okay, okay, so I may be the teeniest bit smitten with the fella. So sue me. )
In the end no one seemed to treat me like I had bubonic plague, so I consider that to be a positive sign. His step-sister gave me a little hug as we parted and her husband took my hand in both of his and stared into my eyes as he said that it was good meeting me, plus as CuteNerdBoy's aunt drove me home, with him in the passenger seat (I ducked into the back seat before anything could be discussed because I hate to seem presumptuous - I thought it terrific of them to drive me all the way across the Valley when the concert was on the same side of town in which they lived - they seemed to not even consider it an issue), we spoke rather easily, I thought. That's a good thing, right?
His mother was very sweet and very nice and way too young looking to have a son the same age as me (his aunt is pretty young looking too). I knew that CuteNerdBoy had a good relationship with his mother, but it was so cute to see them together - he's obviously close to her, but he doesn't seem to be a mama's boy. Hanging out with all of them, I can certainly see the genesis of CuteNerdBoy's sense of humor, which I think is rather similar to mine, as well as his generally open nature. It was just a wonderful time with good music, people watching (the cutest nearly-three-year-old twin girls were dancing nearby, sometimes with their mother) and a group of fun, friendly folks.
For me, you know what was best of all about yesterday's big band evening? Soon after I arrived, when I had gotten myself situated on the blanket sitting in front of CuteNerdBoy, he leaned over from his low beach chair, tapped me on the shoulder, and said to me, his mouth not too far from my ear, "I'm really glad you could make it."
Me too, my friend. Me too.
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